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Ask for Help – the 3rd Key to Maintaining Focus

In the 1st Key, we looked at the big list, and in the 2nd Key, took everything off the plate that we could using the first 3 of the 4 D’s from Julie Morgenstern’s Time Management from the Inside Out:

  1. Delete
  2. Delay
  3. Diminish
  4. Delegate

The 3rd Key is all about delegating.  It’s about taking the things that you’ve got left on the plate and asking the question – for which of these things is it critical that I do them personally and what can I give away?

In this society, we’re taught that it’s wrong to ask for help.  You should be able to do it yourself, right?  Just pick yourself up by your bootstraps and get to work.  But the truth is that the really successful people understand that no one gets there by themselves.  You have to be willing to ask for help.

“But Debra,” you say:

  • If I ask for help, don’t I look weak?
  • If I ask for help, aren’t I vulnerable to being taken advantage of (could also sound like, what if they steal my material?)
  • I can’t ask for help, everyone else is just as stressed and overwhelmed as I am!
  • What if they say “No?”

Regarding the first point – ask yourself this, if you don’t ask for help, and aren’t able to come through on your promises as a result – how will you look then?

Regarding the second point – I’m recommending delegation, NOT abdication.  Be smart in how you work with people -and set up accountability procedures.

Regarding the third and fourth point – whenever you ask, you must be OK with them saying, “No.”  If you don’t allow the “No”, then you’re not asking, you’re manipulating.

But let me ask you this – when someone you love and care about asks you for help, how do you feel?  I’m not talking about the person who always asks and never offers, always takes and never gives. I’m talking about the person who mostly does for themselves – when they ask for help, how do you feel?  If it’s someone you really care about – I bet you feel honored and grateful to be able to give to the people you love.  By not ever asking for help – you are holding out on the people you care about.  You’re cheating them of the opportunity to contribute to you and to express their love and caring for you.  So asking for help is being generous – isn’t it?

And if it’s OK for them to say “No.” because they just can’t this time, then they will also have the space to say, “Yes.” if and when they can.  And you need to trust people to take good care of themselves.  Support them in being honest with you – let them know that it’s OK if they say no.  And then accept their generosity graciously and with gratitude.  You could also look for ways to give back and help them out when they need it.

When it comes to asking for help from your fans and followers, as an artist, you are offering them an opportunity to play with you at a deeper level.  When fans volunteer for an artist they love, they become more committed and invested in your success.  And as a result, they are more likely to share you with others, buy from you, and commit to being your fan for the long term.

And isn’t that really what you want?  Committed, passionate lifetime fans?  The best way to create that relationship with your fans is to ASK FOR THEIR HELP!

So who are you going to ask for help?  Let me know how it goes!

How to Create Focus

Artists MBA, Professional ProgramAt any given moment, on any given day, the average person is thinking about 14 different things – Does that sound familiar? Between the Day Job (for many Artists), family, your personal needs (such as exercise), and your ambitions for creating your business as a professional in the Arts & Entertainment Industry, life can be overwhelming!

In the ArtistsMBA Classes on Time Management and Project Management, we look at how to prioritize and design your systems to choose what to accomplish when. But when you sit down to actually do what you have chosen to do …

How do you filter out all of the distractions, both internal and external?

“The shorter way to do many things is to do only one thing at a time.”
Mozart

Without focus, your efficiency and effectiveness suffers AND you have a lot less fun!

In this Class, you’ll learn:

  • The 3 biggest focus stealers
  • How to set clear internal and external focus boundaries
  • Simple and easy exercises to focus your mind

Whether you’re creating your art or music, marketing and promoting yourself or spending time with your family, improving your ability to focus will improve your success.

Additional Resources for this Class:

Prerequisite Class:

Listen to the Class:

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Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.

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Next Class:

Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.


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Clear the Plate – the 2nd Key to Maintaining Focus

In the first installment of this series we created a big brainstorm list of all the stuff that makes up the chaos.  Just to remind you of the overview:

5 Keys to Manage Chaos

  1. Acknowledge the reality of your current circumstances
  2. Take everything off the plate that you can
  3. Ask for help
  4. Manage your emotions and thoughts through the experience
  5. Get the learning

And now for the second key:

Take it off the Plate!

Read more

Maintaining Focus in the Face of Chaos – 1st Key

The Holiday Season can be so joyfully chaotic, can’t it?  Parties and travel and family (with all the baggage that goes with that!).  For many performers there are also holiday gigs and holiday gift promotions to promote on top of that.  It can all be so overwhelming.  So many things to do, so many demands on your time.

Time management and project management systems are critical to your success at all times and I cover them elsewhere in the blog.  Very often, when faced with unusually busy times, all of our time management skills fly out the window. So, this series of 5 blog posts will answer the question – How do I maintain my focus and my sanity in the face of chaos?

5 Keys to Manage Chaos

  1. Read more

Systems Creation – Work Smarter, Not Harder

Artists MBA, Foundation ProgramDefinition of Systems:
A set of detailed methods, procedures, and routines established or formulated to carry out a specific activity, perform a duty, or solve a problem.
BusinessDictionary.com

Underlying your productivity (or lack of it) lies the effectiveness of your systems.  Many creative people struggle with business, not because they don’t know what to do, but because they haven’t created systems that operate in the ways they organically think.

Creating systems for your business will allow you to:

  • Streamline your methods and maximize your time
  • Create repeatable and sustainable results
  • Keep your promises to yourself and others
  • Reduce your stress!

In this class, you’ll learn:

  • How systems facilitate (not limit!) creativity and set you free
  • How to identify good candidates for systems creation
  • How to design and implement systems procedures

A system will take time to create – but once created will save you time every time.  And the biggest advantage is that once you’ve created a system for an activity – you will be able to delegate it and know that it’s being run the same way you would run it!

Resources for this Class:

Prerequisite Class:

Listen to the Class:

Thank you for your interest. This content is visible to ArtistsMBA Foundation, Professional, Mastery Program members only. Click here to login.

Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($5 for first 14 days then $39 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.

Read the Class Transcript

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Next Class:

Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.


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How to Maintain Consistent Growth and Development

Have you ever pushed yourself out of your comfort zone?  You know, created something really different, taken a risk that felt scary and hard, pushed through a tough learning curve, talked to someone who totally intimidated you?

And after that push – did you feel the almost irresistible urge to pull back to your safety zone – even if your push out was really successful?  You know the two steps forward and one step back?  Why do we feel the need for that one step back?

I call it:

The Stretch Reflex

In physiology, the stretch reflex (also called the myotatic reflex) occurs when you stretch a muscle to the point of pain and hold it for longer than about 10 seconds.  The muscle contracts against the stretch.  This contraction is an autonomic (involuntary) reaction which attempts to resist the change in muscle length by causing the stretched muscle to contract. The more sudden the change in muscle length, the stronger the muscle contractions against the stretch will be. This basic function of the muscle spindle helps to maintain muscle tone and to protect the body from injury.

In physical therapy, I learned that if you hold the stretch and breath through the muscle’s desire to contract, consciously relaxing that muscle, the contraction will stop and you will actually be able to go even deeper into the stretch.  The trick is not to give in to that contraction, and just breathe while maintaining your position and consciously relaxing the muscle.

I believe that in behavior we also have an autonomic (involuntary) stretch reflex.  When you’ve pushed yourself beyond your comfort zone, your unconscious wants you to contract in order to protect yourself from being hurt.  That contraction could look like getting sick, like wanting to curl up in bed for several days or even just procrastinating about getting back to a normal schedule after a big push.

But if we give in to that contraction, then growth (both personal and professional) becomes sporadic and difficult to maintain.  So, how do we maintain that stretch through the contraction so that we can increase and expand our comfort zone?

Awareness – Always the First Step

One of the key tools in any growth is awareness.  If you’re not aware that you’re in the middle of a stretch reflex, you will likely surrender to it and allow it to pull you back into your comfort zone.

You also need to use your awareness to differentiate between the stretch reflex and your need to rest after a big energetic push.   I’m talking about consistent growth, NOT constant growth.  You need to pace your energy so that you are not constantly pushing yourself to and beyond your limits.

“Balancing stress and recovery is critical not just in competitive sports, but also in managing energy in all facets of our lives.  When we expand energy, we draw down our reservoir.  When we recover energy, we fill it back up.  Too much energy expenditure without sufficient recovery eventually leads to burnout and breakdown.  (Overuse it and lose it.)  Too much recovery without sufficient stress leads to atrophy and weakness.  (Use it or lose it.)”
The Power of Full Engagement

In the last month, I spent about 3 weeks putting in 11 hour days to complete the website and Membership revamp before leaving for SXSW and then 11 days of conference intensity in Austin.

When I returned, I needed to take several days to recuperate.  That’s not the stretch reflex.  That’s simply refilling my reservoir.  But once I recovered, I could feel the urge to procrastinate rather than getting back to a productive schedule.

No coincidence that I had already planned on this topic for my next newsletter!

So use the power of your awareness to identify if what you’re experiencing is recuperation or the stretch reflex.  If you find yourself pulling inward, ask yourself:

Is this fatigue or fear?

If it’s fatigue – rest!  If it’s fear – what are you afraid of?  Sometimes our fear kicks in AFTER we’ve taken a risk.  So, if you can name the fear and embrace and celebrate the risk – even if it led to something other than success – then you will be able to breathe through the urge pull inward.

And once you’ve identified that what you’re experiencing is a stretch reflex; don’t try to push yourself deeper into the stretch.  Just breathe and maintain the level you’re at.  The ability to go further out of your comfort zone requires you to first become comfortable at this level of exposure.  So, breathe and maintain.

And when this becomes comfortable and easy – then stretch out further.

Unblock Your Creativity

Artists MBA, Professional ProgramAs professionals in the field of creativity, we rely on accessing our creativity to create success.

That creativity needs to be engaged, not just in creating your product, but also in your marketing, your systems, every aspect of your business.

But our creativity can be like a sensitive child. And it can shut down for many different reasons. In this class we’ll examine:

  • The blocks that get in the way of accessing our creativity
  • How to get unblocked
  • And ways to prevent those blocks from happening in the first place

Additional Resources for this Class:

Prerequisite Class:

Listen to the Class:

Thank you for your interest. This content is visible to ArtistsMBA Professional, Mastery Program members only. Click here to login.

Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.

Read the Class Transcript

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Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Mastery Lab to access the transcript of this class today


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Next Class:

Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.


Thank you for your interest. This content is visible to ArtistsMBA Foundation Program members only. Click here to login.

Setting Goals for 2011

Every year, I take some personal time to assess, adjust, write new goals for the New Year and make a plan for achieving those goals. I’d like to share part of this process with you – and encourage you to use it for yourself to create a powerful, prosperous and joyful 2011. I hope you will find this peek into my process helpful.

In this eighth post in the series, I’m moving into the second step of my process –

Goal Setting for 2011

There are three steps to this process:

  1. Reviewing my Goals for 2010
  2. Setting 1 Year Goals for 2011
  3. Breaking those goals down into 3-4 month increments

Reviewing My Goals from 2010

When looking back at my goals from the previous year I want to do 3 things:

  1. Celebrate my successes – Woo Hoo!
  2. Look at what worked and didn’t work – particularly around the goals I didn’t accomplish
  3. Apply those lessons to the coming year

Looking at my goals from last year was very confronting as for the most part, I didn’t complete them.  Yes, I’m admitting it publicly.  I’m a coach – and I’m not perfect.

Whew – there, I said it.  But that’s part of the point of this blog.  It’s not about – look at me, see what a guru I am – don’t you want to be like me?  It’s more about – here’s my process.  I’m human just like you.  And I’m a work in progress.  And that means – if I can do it, so can you!  And hopefully, there are things I can contributed to your process to make you more successful.

So, in looking back at last year and looking specifically at what worked and didn’t work, I’ve seen some things that I want to share with you.

Set Goals With Specific Deadlines

In writing my goals last year, I just wrote the goals – I didn’t give each goal a specific deadline.  I was writing what I wanted to accomplish at some point during the year.  What didn’t work was being specific about when I would be accomplishing it.  Lacking a specific time frame, I didn’t know when I was supposed to start working on them and they just kept getting pushed by more urgent things.

So, this year, I will not only write specific Deadlines for the accomplishment of each goal, but also set a start date for each project.

Keep Goals in the Forefront of Your Awareness

I wrote those goals and then set them aside.  I didn’t post them anywhere and I didn’t refer to them.  Yes, I knew they were my goals for the year.  But they weren’t in the forefront of my awareness – and so it was really easy to postpone beginning those projects.

In addition, because I’m not currently working with a coach and no longer have a business partner – there were no other voices holding me accountable to those commitments.

So, this year, I’ll do a few things differently:

  • Send my goals to my accountability partner, and ask for her support in achieving them.
  • Post my goals on my bulletin board and read them every morning

Build a Structure for Accomplishing Your Goals

Last year, I moved my business out of my home.  And I somehow never re-established my time management structure with my new circumstances.  It all fell by the wayside and I found myself running my day by the seat of my pants.  That has never worked for me in the past – and there were many ways it didn’t work for me last year.  And I knew it wasn’t working for me.  I intended to spend the summer really setting up those structures.  But then my Dad got sick and everything changed.

Now that I’ve moved across country and I will be having even more demands on my time, I know that re-establishing my foundation is absolutely vital both to my business success, but also to my own happiness and satisfaction in my life.

So, here’s my plan:

  1. Write my goals with start and end dates and share those with my accountability partner
  2. Break the larger goals down into sub-goals with start and end dates
  3. Create PRD’s for 2011 first quarter for each area of my life and make sure my goals are built into those PRD’s
  4. Create a Time Map for my current situation and implement that map immediately
  5. Re-institute my daily bookends (morning and evening rituals)

Managing Conflicting Priorities

Artists MBA, Professional ProgramAt any given moment, on any given day, you could be doing a hundred different things, right? And at any given moment on any given day, you probably see half a dozen things that seem to be of equal urgency and priority. But you’re just one person. So how do you choose the right action?

Managing your priorities is probably the biggest challenge to maintain your time management system. And these conflicts are the most common challenge to your chosen structure and the slippery slope back into your old habits of just doing the thing that’s screaming loudest in front of you.

In this class you’ll discover:

  • How to make the smart decision
  • How to feel good about your choices
  • How to manage other people’s expectations and the guilty feelings that often accompany them

Time Management is always about choices – so learning how to choose wisely is a critical skill to effective time management.

Additional Resources for this Class:

Prerequisite Class:

Listen to the Class:

Thank you for your interest. This content is visible to ArtistsMBA Professional, Mastery Program members only. Click here to login.

Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.

Read the Class Transcript

Thank you for your interest. This content is visible to ArtistsMBA Mastery Program members only. Click here to login.

Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Mastery Lab to access the transcript of this class today


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Next Class:

Ready to get serious? Enroll in the Artists Marketing & Business Academy Professional Program to access these classes today!

Your Tuition ($79 per month) includes all Foundation level classes PLUS the Professional level classes PLUS the Time Management Mastery Course & App.


Thank you for your interest. This content is visible to ArtistsMBA Foundation Program members only. Click here to login.

How to Manage Conflicting Priorities

In our complex, day-to-day lives, we have a multitude of priorities calling for our attention.  Some call in a whisper.  Others scream from the rooftops.  And the soft voice of the things that we most long to accomplish is often drowned out by the fires and clamoring of these conflicting priorities.

No matter how good your time management structures and systems are, if you don’t figure out how to manage these conflicts, you will be hard-pressed to maintain those systems.   So how do you decide where to spend your resources for the best outcome?

Have Clear Goals

It’s a funny thing – when I know exactly what my goals are, then evaluating and deciding which priorities to invest my time, energy and resources into becomes easier.  When my goals are clear and specific with hard and fast deadlines – then I can decide which opportunities are in line with my goals and which are distractions.

It sounds simplistic, but it’s true.

When your goals are clear it becomes simpler to make decisions and it becomes easier to say “No”, because you know what you are saying “Yes” to.

Create Time Blocks

When you’ve got clear goals and you know what you’re saying “Yes” to, but you still are managing multiple projects and claims on your time, the best way I’ve found to organize my thinking as well as my time is by creating clear time blocks, even days, for each priority or project.

For example, if one of my priorities is working with another person on their priorities, I can say – “I’ve set aside Friday morning for you.”   And I can clear my plate (and my email and phone) from those interruptions until it’s time.

Bottom line – multitasking doesn’t work.  Study after study has shown that the more you are flitting from thing to thing, or doing two things at once, the less effective you are.  By creating a specific block of time to work on a project, you can focus all of your mind, energy and resources to create a better result in less overall time.

And when the idea floats into your mind, “Oh, don’t forget to do X for that other project.”  Just make a note and come back to it when it’s that project’s time.

Ask the Right Questions

Once you’re clear on your goals and you’ve created a schedule to accomplish those goals, that doesn’t mean new opportunities, other people’s needs or even ideas for new projects won’t come up for you.  In fact, I’ve found the more effective I’m being; the more those things seem to happen.  But you can evaluate and make choices about these new possible priorities by asking powerful questions:

Is this my urgency or someone else’s?

Very often, we will prioritize other people’s needs over our own.  And when we try to resist that call, our inner critic starts in with the “Aren’t you being selfish?” message.

Look, your family and your loved ones are important.  If you’re managing a day job in order to pay the bills – your boss and your job are important, too.  But by always prioritizing other people’s needs or priorities over your own, you are actively destroying your own self-worth. You are saying, “I’m NOT worth it.  I don’t matter.”  And if you have children – you are teaching them to do the same.

So, get clear:

  • Get clear on whose agenda you’re serving.
  • Get clear on the consequences of saying “No.”
  • Get clear on what the payoff for you is for saying, “Yes.”

Make sure that what you imagine is the consequence is actually real.  (If I don’t take my sister to the airport, she’ll stop loving me…  Really?) And be careful of the flattery payoff.  Often when someone picks US to help them, we are flattered that they value our talents.  But remember to value your own goals over their flattery.  When all is said and done, you’ll have helped them achieve their goals while sacrificing your own.

Then make a choice and stand by it.  You’re allowed to say, “No.”  Remember, there are no right choices or wrong choices.  There are only choices with varying consequences.   Also remember, that we train people how to treat us.  If you feel like your family doesn’t respect your goals, that’s because you’ve taught them not to.  If you start respecting and prioritizing your goals, they will, too.

Does this project serve my goals?  Which goal, specifically?

The clearer you are on which goal you’re serving, the easier it becomes to make a choice.  And also where in your schedule to place it.

By spending time on this priority am I moving towards something?  Or away from something else – perhaps a goal that brings up fear, considerations or obstacles?

Notice if you’re using another priority to avoid facing something.  (I’m too busy to work on my music, because of yah de, yah de, yah de…)

Remember, there is no right or wrong choice.  Each choice has consequences – some predictable and some not.  The question, then, is:

Does this choice bring me closer to my goals and dreams?

Is this choice in line with my values and principles?

And finally – be realistic about how much time you actually have.  Often when looking at projects or priorities, it’s better to think in terms of serial monogamy than polyamory.  Doing one project at a time and doing it well will bring you closer to the life of your dreams than will working on multiple projects and not doing them as well, or never finishing them.

When looking at opportunities – remember that all opportunities aren’t your opportunity.  And that we live in an abundant universe filled with opportunities.  Don’t just say, “Yes” to this opportunity because it kinda sorta looks like what you want.  You can say, “No.”  It won’t mean that you will never have another opportunity.  In fact, often you have to say, “No” to the mediocre opportunities before the Universe will start sending you the great ones.